Cut

So, I was hanging out with some friends Saturday when I got a text from her, asking for her motorcycle key back (I'd originally taken it so I could start her bike once in a while while she was in the hospital). I was near on the other side of town so I told her I would half to get it later; or drive over to where I was to get it. She said she'd rather I drop what I was doing and take it to her.

Much to say that I didn't. This led to her getting upset enough to threaten me with calling the constables... I'm sorry?  I called her bluff on it by not doing anything, though she kept sending message after message about how much of a "bad" friend I was, etc. etc.

So towards the end of my time with my friends, she called and said she just wanted the key back. I did drop it off into her mailbox and just left. I didn't want my last memory of seeing her be of her hostile.

So now she is no longer friends with me, and I'm for one am more or less grateful for it; though I still feel bad for her mom being alone in her fight to save her daughter. I'm the second close friend she's cut out of her life, and I'm pretty certain more will follow.

Everything I'd done for her in the past couple of weeks has now turned to waste, what am I to do aside from continuing to pray for her.

I do feel lighter now, though I still feel a bit horrible for being so. Was there more I could've done? Many near this situation say that I've done so much, are amazed with all I've done as well to see how long I was around to try and help her. Personally, I don't know that answer, and it's going to take some time to figure out. Though, I guess I knew I was finish with her when she broke my patience. I don't like being over that thresh hold and it takes quite a lot to get me where I was that other night. Sarah told me that if I had tried to stay around the girl would just throw me over the line over and over and I agree, and so her cutting me out of her life has become mutual.

I surprised myself last night when, while I was talking to Sarah, I'd ask if she'd go to the girl's funeral should she succeeded in killing herself. She said yes; myself though, I feel like I'm too angered and disconnected to do so. I would go for her mother's sake... but for now, not for her, and that makes me sad.

Now what... I need to continue praying, and refocus onto things that matter.