So as I've posted on my facebook last Friday I was at a church retreat for my Sunday evening Bible study group "Paradigm". It wasn't at all what I had expected, but it was still a lot of fun, full of fellowship and laughter.
I asked one of my friends to come along with to help her get to know people from the group and she agreed thinking that there would be some structure schedule and of course some Bible studying. We've come to find out that it was more of a fellowship retreat though there were some messages and a few groups that had a topic study. Unfortunately my friend was asleep for the topic study and was a little annoyed that she'd missed it. I tried my best to help her have a good time but it just wasn't working that well. Hmm..
Today I was going to talk about what the messages were from church last night and how they impacted me, but I have something a bit more... important? to talk about. I'll start with this question:
Q.) How do you minister with someone who's losing their faith?
During the service the pastor was talking about if you're not walking in the light, you're walking in darkness (obvious right?) And gave a few examples of what's considered being in darkness vs. light. My friend was feeling as though she was being condemned rather than being convicted and just started crying. I didn't notice it at the time and thought she was just tired. When we went to the Bible study, we were going over James chapter 4 and my friend felt even more condemned through the evening. I can honestly say I can't figure out how to connect how what either of the these times were condemning. I personally felt that they were convicting rather than condemning, both telling you that there's something wrong with your life, but with the difference of where the source of that telling is coming from.
When we got into the car to get dinner, she started to cry more and while I tried my best to console her she told me she wanted to give up. I told her that she needed to hold onto God and continue to pray and she asked me for how long. I said for as long as it takes to get an answer. As we headed toward dinner, she asked me about grace and the only example that I could come up with at the time was the utter removal of debt, that it was receiving something we didn't deserve.
All in all though, I felt a failure for not being able to do more last time to lift her up in faith. I'm still not sure what else to do except try to have her talk to the pastor or our Bible study teacher to help her iron out her thought processes. There's been so much going on with her this month that made everything horrible for her, loss of job and income, anniversary of her father's death, people pulling away from her, etc.. Things that have started to pile up on her heart lately. I gave her the thought of what if God was pulling things away from her so that He could have a better chance of getting her attention better. It seemed like a left field idea, but I hope it makes her think and try to find a spiritual reason for why things are happening the way they are.
I can only pray and do my best, but Father, you are the one that can do the most healing. I place my tongue in your hand so that whatever I say to her is from you. I place my hands in yours so that you may guide me so that I may best know what to do. Help me a small light that will help guide her back to your life giving light. Amen.
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